The experiment

WALHT: write an interesting and enjoyable narrative

Success criteria:

• Plan
• Write the words for the introductions
• Write a powerful introduction

Star labs, working, shrinking potion, 16 years ago, James, Ofiice, Convince

A very long time ago my friend James was working on a experiment on a shrinking potion. James’s skin is very fair, his hair looks like a mop facial features very dull and wrinkled. James and I have been friends since 5th grade when we were in primary. James and I worked at star labs working on technology stuff like robotics, computers, phones and all sorts of stuff. Every day every minutes james would always be in his office trying to get the potion rite. I keep telling James “It’s a nice day outside let's go for a picnic at the park.”

Editting:

16 years ago my best friend James was working on a shrinking potion. We met in the 5th grade when we were in primary. We were working at star labs where his office is. I always tried to convince him to come outside but he would always deny me. Everytime I walk into Star labs I always see him in his office still working on the shrinking potion.

Huge, humongous, crash, smash, screaming, sirens, police, innocent people, Balcony, luckily, Nocturnal creature, Tangled,

I go out for lunch and have a good look at the view from my hotel. The clouds very muted and fading to grey. While I was relaxing on my balcony I hear sirens and people screaming. I dash down the stairs and take a look about what's happening. I see building tumble people getting hurt. The all of a sudden there is a humongous giant tumbling down our village. I take a closer look and it is James. I run towards him and say “ James stop this madness right now you are hurting innocent people”!!!! He did not stop but luckily the power lines tangled up around his legs and he tripped. James replied and said “ I didn't mean to cause any harm I just want to find a cure for my shrinking potion, there was a fault in it”.

I had a very relaxing time on my balcony until I heard sirens and people screaming. I dash down the stairs and run I see huge building tumbling and cars flipping. I sprint towards the danger and take a closer look. Then all of a sudden I see some kind of humongous nocturnal creature. I run towards it and it was my best friend James. James got to close but luckily the strong power lines tangled up around his legs and he tumbled over. When he fell I went to go and tell him “take yourself in while I will find a cure”!!! He replied “there was a fault in my experiment and I did not mean to cause any harm.”

Replied, army camp, 45 rooms, relieved

I replied “just take yourself in and I will find the cure, it might take me 3 days. So I dash to Star Labs and figure out the cure. I find the equipment and I work out the math. 6 days later I finally got the cure rite. I run to the Army camp and ask permission for him to get released. They did not allow me so I went thru the vents trying to find his room. As I go past every room I was seeing ugly frightening creatures. After I past 45 rooms I finally arrived in James room. I slid down the vent into James room. I yell “ Wake up James I have the cure. He wakes up and he looks relieved to see me. He looked miserable and his stubble was covering her whole lower face. His eyes bloodshot red.